yesterday was...

A good day for:

Ducks. Julekha, a 35-year-old Bangladeshi woman, chopped off her neighbour's penis with a knife when he attempted to rape her. She later gave the severed organ to the police, saying: "I first planned to feed it to my ducks, but later changed my mind."

A bad day for:

Australian student nurses, who are to be required to sob their way through Wuthering Heights and other tear-jerking novels in order to learn about death, loss and grief. This novel approach is intended to teach them how to show compassion to their patients.